you're my top 10

Hi, I'm Mahirah.

<3 popeyes.

New year is almost here.

Let's review what have happened to me for this year.

Jan '10

Things weren't so well.

Broken friendships with Fendi and Rid.

Starbucks

<3

Feb '10

Haziq's a pain in my neck.

HAHA.

<3

March '10

Smitha's Bdae.

Things weren't well with Smitha but we made it through.

I <3 Her.

April '10

Fendi and I are friends again

<3

May '10

This month, i find school to be awesome.

<3 my classmates, <3 my badminton friends, <3 my IJS mates, <3 my CCA friends, <3 Super Junior.

<3

June '10

Amir was the best man on earth.

<3

July '10

I turned 17 on this month.

<3

August '10

Fasting month.

<3

I lost myself

September '10

Hari Raya.

This month i felt rich.

<3

I'm gaining my confidence.

<3

October '10

I felt smarter after getting my result.

Hi, welcome to Popeyes!

<3

I'm believing in myself again.

November '10

<3 OE Popeyes

<3 I'm moving on strongly

December '10

Harry Potter 7

Amir

Cambodia.

Christmas.

<3

My top 10 precious people in my 2010 life <3

1. Family

When I'm not strong, they're there for me.

When I'm turning evil/ insane , they're there to tell me I'm wrong.

When I'm kind, they're there to tell me I'm good.

When I'm pissed, they're there being quiet.

I've always love my family but this year I love my family because they're a family to me.

2. Smitha

When I'm sad, she's there to make me laugh.

When I'm happy, she's there to make me go crazy/

When I'm crazy, she's there to make me go active.

3. Amir

When I think I'm losing myself, he's there to tell me it's okay to be lost.

When I'm sad, he's there to cheer me up.

When I'm sleepy, he's there to see my unglam face

4. Alice + Wahidah

When I think I'm mean, they're there to remind me how nice I am.

When I'm craving for ice-cream, she's there to buy ice-cream for me.

When I miss Amir, she's there to tell Amir I miss Amir.

5. Faiz

When I'm not in good terms with Amir, he's there to make me understand Amir more.

When Amir's busy and not by my side, he's there to be the next annoying Amir.

When Amir disturb me, he's there to make the jokes more funnier.

6. Jiayi

When I'm lost in class, she's there to explain to me.

When I'm hyper, she's there to entertain my annoying-ness.

When I'm sad/ angry in school, she's there to calm me down.

7. Fendi

When I'm bored otw back home on friday , he's there to walk with me to clementi interchange.

When I'm bored in class, he's there to sms me.

When I'm looking lost in school, he's there to see my lost face.

8. Irfaniah

When I'm laughing, she's laughing too.

When I'm nonsensical, she's there to entertain me.

When I'm crazy, she's crazy too.

9. GPG

When I'm laughing, they're laughing too.

When I'm being like a bitch, they'll be bitches too.

When I see/ do stupid things during work time, they're there to witness them too.

10. Julyn

When I'm crazy, she's crazy too.

When I'm happy, she's there to join my happiness.

When I do stupid things, she's there to laugh at me.

hehe, make it 11.<3

Dear الله, 

thank you for letting me know these people :)

Amin.

So how's christmas?

Hi, I'm Mahirah.

I'm not funny, i wish i am.

As my title goes "So how's Christmas?" ,

Christmas was awesome.

Hehe.

Though I don't party, I had an awesome Christmas because of Alice, Amir, Atikah, Saf, Yana and workmates :)

<3

Thanks Alice for the Ice-cream!

Really enjoyed eating Ice-cream with you! :)

Wuuuu~

Chilling sungguh bile ku go to work.

HEHE.

Thanks Saf and Yana for being funny during work:D

So kecoh lah krg!

"barbeque-ish, barbeque-ish, barbeque-ish,wish, wish, barbeque-ish!"

KEHEHEHE.

Aku suke kerje dgn krg!

HEHE.

Aww thanks Atikah for dropping down to workplace.

HEHE, you look super pretty yesterday:D

Minah Korean!

HEHE.

Lastly, thanks Amir for making me laugh like shit yesterday:)

With you around me, you make me feel as though my world is prefect.

<3

Can't wait for new year!

Wee~

Has anyone make their new year resolution?

:D

I haven't I think I'll make one when I'm ready.

HAHA.

Last year's wishes

Are this year's apologies

Every last time I come home

I take my last chance

To burn a bridge or two

I only keep myself sick in the head

Cause I know how the words get you

We're the new face of failure

Prettier and younger but not any better off

Bulletproof and loneliness

At best, at best

Me and you

Sitting in a honeymoon

If I woke up next to you

If I woke up next to you

Me and you

Sitting in a honeymoon

If I woke up next to you

If I woke up next to you

Collect the bad habits

That you couldn't bare to keep

Out of the woods but I love

A tree I used to lay beneath

Kisses still there

From a sour bottle baby girl

With eyes the size of baby worlds

We're the new face of failure

Prettier and younger but not any better off

Bulletproof and loneliness

At best, at best

Me and you

Sitting in a honeymoon

If I woke up next to you

If I woke up next to you

Me and you

Sitting in a honeymoon

If I woke up next to you

If I woke up next to you

Me and you

Sitting in a honeymoon

If I woke up next to you

If I woke up next to you

Me and you

Sitting in a honeymoon

If I woke up next to you

If I woke up next to you

The best way

To make it through

With hearts and wrists in tact

Is to realize

Two outta three ain't bad

Ain't bad

Me and you

Sitting in a honeymoon

If I woke up next to you

If I woke up next to you

Me and you

(Honeymoon)

Sitting in a honeymoon

(In a honeymoon)

Me and you

Sitting in a honeymoon

If I woke up next to you

If I woke up next to you

Me and you

Sitting in a honeymoon

If I woke up next to you

If I woke up next to you 

the end.

you're mahirah, that's why i can't forget you

Hi, I'm Mahirah.

i'm ugly.

Amir is the sweetest friend i ever have.

He's the only guy friend who can understand my confusion and my complicated mindset.

He doesn't blame me for being mean/ bad towards us.

Instead he blames himself for not being able to make us happen.

It's funny how an adorable and good-looking man like him can like an ugly and not pretty girl like me.

Maybe it's true when they said some handsome man likes ugly girl :Z

It's funny how I can be close to him when he's my ex-bf's best friend.

It's unbelievable that I can like him when he's actually was with his Ex that point of time.

When was the first time we told one another we like one another more than friends?

:)

Heh, it's funny if you're to think back how far we've been through.

From strangers to friendly-enemies to friends to close friends to scandals to PT-BF to Complicated friends to darlings to ... So what are we currently uh? :D

Gee, we're so whatever lah eh.

HAHA.

December's been a good month so far.

:)

AND Christmas is almost here.

Wee~

Can irritate my wonderful friends with my monotonous voice of Christmas Songs.

i <3 coffee, and you too my readers.

can you see the heart? <3

i guess you look through my heart instead of my ugly appearance :)

I don't want a lot for Christmas
There's just one thing I need
I don't care about the presents
Underneath the Christmas tree
I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
All I want for Christmas is...
You

I don't want a lot for Christmas
There's just one thing I need
I don't care about the presents
Underneath the Christmas tree
I don't need to hang my stocking
There upon the fireplace
Santa Claus won't make me happy
With a toy on Christmas day
I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
All I want for Christmas is you
You baby

I won't ask for much this Christmas
I don't even wish for snow
I'm just gonna keep on waiting
Underneath the mistletoe
I won't make a list and send it
To the North Pole for Saint Nick
I won't even stay awake to
Hear those magic reindeers click
'Cause I just want you here tonight
Holding on to me so tight
What more can I do
Baby all I want for Christmas is you
Ooh baby
All the lights are shining
So brightly everywhere
And the sound of children's
Laughter fills the air
And everyone is singing
I hear those sleigh bells ringing
Santa won't you bring me the one I really need
Won't you please bring my baby to me...

Oh I don't want a lot for Christmas
This is all I'm asking for
I just want to see my baby
Standing right outside my door
Oh I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
Baby all I want for Christmas is...
You

All I want for Christmas is you... baby (repeat and fade) 

Hello, I'm Back in Singapore :)

Hi, I'm Mahirah.

I prefer Eminem rather than K-POP.

So I'm back from Cambodia safely.

Trip to Cambodia was very exciting, challenging and tiring :)

I <3 Cambodia and I miss Cambodia :(

Sorry Amir, Faiz, Fendi and Adam for sleeping when I'm supposed to meet all of you to give your souvenirs.

Haha, I promise I'll meet all of you soon. :D

Thanks for continue reading my blog even though I was away from Cambodia, really appreciate it.

Though maybe some of you who read my blog are just blog-hoppers or haters or to criticize my way of blogging, i still appreciate it :D

Huhu.

I really miss my family, friends and work:)

That reminds me to call the store and ask them my work schedule. :Z

Should get it done by tonight.

For now, i'll enjoy watching video and surfing the net.

Messages I appreciate when I was  in Cambodia:

Mommy

Alice

Amir

Fendi

Faiz

Ryan

Wahidah

december.

Hi, I'm Mahirah.

Slowness is my forte.

Sorry for the late update.

:(

I'm very sorry.

I was too busy and sick till i forgot to blog:(

I'm going to Cambodia next week, hence i won't be blogging again for another week.

But i promise you readers that I'll blog as soon as I get back home next week.

:)

Yes, that's a promise for you, my readers:)

Harry Potter 7 is awesome.

Yes, freaking awesome.

I'm going to watch Rapunzel after coming back from Cambodia:)

Hehe.

Amir and I are back on talking terms.

Awesome(Y)

Gosh, I think December's going to be a good month.

*Cross fingers really hard*

HAHA.

I sound so desperate in being happy.

haha, oh well.

maybe because i've been too unhappy for the past few months.

HAHA.

:D:D:D

I hope december's going to be a good month for all EARTHLINGS!

It has to be a good month:D

I can't wait for Christmas, wanna sing Christmas songs and irritate Amir:D

HOHOHO.

Many things to look forward to= Many things to prepare.

But I'm happy to be a busy girl.

:D

Alice Tan.

Wahidah.

<3

maybe i was in the wrong.

Hi, I'm Mahirah.

i'm sorry for not trying to understand you.

yes, i'm bad at replying people's text.

i'm sorry.

i'm very sorry fendi. :(

injection is killing me indirectly. :(

i wish i'm okay in a few hours time since i'm going sch later and not to forget work. 

i miss GPG. :'(

i wish i wasn't naive and things go back to normal.

today isn't a bad day but a sad day.

i wish i don't think too much.

:(

i'll be fine soon.

i just need faiz to cheer me up:S

OE poyeyes

hi, i'm mahirah

i hate everything about me, yet i'm a happy person.

oh yes, i've moved on in a positive way.

to those who received my texts, thanks for being there for me when things were rough.

especially wahidah:)

dear wahidah, my sexy and prettyhead friend, thanks for texting me over and over again to check whether i'm okay. :) syg awak. hehe.

and to look back, i'm not a strong person.

because if i am, i won't be whining about my unhappiness or sadness.

:) i'm just a person who learns how to let go of things easily, i'm ain't a strong person.

only FOR OE POPEYES OWLS :

by the end of month, eye-bags are my best facial features.

by the end of the month, my house electric bill will be boomz.

by the end of the month, my indon would improve.

by the end of the month, i will become snow white.

by the end of the month, i will be super becok.

by the end of the month, i would be missing all of you.

because cambodia is calling me soon:(

No matter how many bad things were to happen to me by the end of the month, I'll still <3 all of you.

Thanks for making work seems tireless and fun.

<3

it's funny how i can still joke around when i'm kinda pissed off.

well, you can't blame me because i'm not a very serious person.

:)

laugher is free.

Hi, I'm Mahirah.

I'm a girl but i wish i was a boy.

when i want to be serious, circumstances won't let me.

when i'm not serious, people dislike me.

in the end, i become a contradicting person.

i wish i'm pretty,

i wish i'm kind,

i wish i'm soft-hearted,

i wish i'm cute,

i wish i'm flawless,

am i asking too much?

no, i don't think so.

because i believe everyone deserves to voice out what they want.

even though, it may not happen.

i smile, i giggle, i laugh, deep down, i'm crying.

i cried on the back home after taking digital camera from sze ling.

it feels great after crying your heart out.

:)

it really does.

thanks for the hug wahidah.

i really need it.

:)

i know i'll be able to pull myself up after being pushed down by reality.

like most of my friends said i'm a strong person, and you who said i'm the strongest girl you've  ever met. 

so until then, i'll be strong until my heart and soul tells me i'm back.

K.O

Hi, I'm Mahirah.

I wish I'm pretty.

Suddenly, your words delivered to me yesterday hit me so badly today. :(

Yes, I don't show others I'm serious about my life that's the reason why I lost lots of wonderful people who used to be in my life, and that includes you. :(

On the way back home, my MP3 plays los of sad songs :(

(8nov, 2010: i changed my relationship status form single to in an open relationship)

(11nov, 2010: you told me we can't keep on going like this)

(14nov, 2010: i cried so badly, losing you is a pain that i haven't had in a really long time)

14nov, 2010 @night:
we had a talk then laugh but yet it's still such a pain.
i told you i was fine, i was lying.
and i know you know i was lying
and you know i know, you was lying.
and yet, we pretend we're cool about letting things go.
now, who's fault is it that we both turn out to be liars?
sadly, we have ourselves to blame for not being brave enough to take up this challenge.
i'm a sag girl with nothing but fake smiles to make things turn out to be fine, what about you on the other hand? i know you probably be behaving and feeling way awful than i am.
:(

I'm a sad girl right now but i'll motivate myself to be strong and move on.

a rough time

Hi, I'm Mahirah.

I'm not a cheerful person.

After work, faiz asked me to meet him.

I didn't want to but he managed to persuade me.

I'm glad he managed to persuade me or else their plan of making me a surprise would be a waste.

:)

I'm seriously touched by the cookies baked by 4 handsome, charming and adorable gentlemen. 

Who are they?

Faiz, Fendi, Rid and Amir. <3

Haha.

And yes amir, thanks for the ice-cream:)

3years have passed by so quickly. And I have to agree many things have happened. Been through lots of happiness, sadness and naiveness. And i come to realise that I'm still the same old me. Yes, I am.

I used to think , after breaking up with my boyfriend which happens a long long time ago, I became someone who doesn't care about anything and someone who isn't serious about relationship or takes guy for granted. But i guess i'm not. I'm serious about my life. I'm concern with what i do/ say to someone. I may be blur and dumb for not getting hints about people liking me but I do take things seriously. I'm always laughing, giggling and snorting but deep down I'm thinking about my life. I hurt few people who care about me and I'm sorry about it. Sorry? I know forgiveness isn't enough but that's all i could do. I'm a sad girl who learns how to smile in order to think positively. No one's a happy person in this world. No one is but they become a happy soul due to the fact they have someone to love/ show concern or someone who treasures him/ her. :)

However, I'm still looking forward to my death because I believe the reason for me living is to wait for death:)

And the life i'm living right now, is challenges set for me before making me lead a heaven's life after death.

Amir: when's the time you think we're became closer?

Me: errr. for me, it's the time when we bought ice-cream and had a long talk about each of our own's relationships.

Amir: Same for me. That's why I'm planning to buy the same ice-cream we had last 3years.

Me: Flashback?

Amia: Yes, i guess. 

Me: Sure. since you're buying them not me.

Amir: You could still crack a joke when i'm trying to be serious. That's why i fall for you.

Me: How should i replied you then?

 Both: *Laughs*

i'm glad we talked about it.

but i'll let you go since it's the best for us.

:D

i'm not happy. i just learn to smile and let it go.

Hi, I'm Mahirah.

Ever start your day with bad news? Well, i just experienced it:0

:(

I'll be strong and move on.

I believe i can do it since I've experienced this more than twice.

I won't ask you why the sudden change or why must you do this to me.

I'll respect your decision and I'll be fine just like how you wish I'll be.

It won't be that quick, but soon i'll be normal again.

Like you used to said: I'm the strongest girl you've met so far.

So I won't disappoint you, I'll make sure you're right about that and we'll pass by these days perfectly fine.

with you or without you, my world will be different but i believe it'll get better.:)

the only way to get it better isn't by waiting and letting time heals my pain but motivate myself to be strong and move on.