Hi, I'm Mahirah.
I kept telling myself to be strong.
I'm afraid of everything around me.
What is wrong with me?
All the ugly pasts kept on haunting me day by day causing me to have lack of sleep and i feel shagged all the time though i haven't even start my day at all.
When will i stop being paranoid, scared and insecure? :|
What a pathetic soul, I am.
I'm in a very bad state.
So bad, that only i know how painful it is.
I am always laughing, smiling and joking around my friends but only i know how bad my state is that i think i could really go insane, wreck everything around me, without a warning. :(
Day by day, i kept on feeling bad, guilty and hatred towards myself.
I find myself pathetic when I look at myself in the mirror.
So pathetic that I am afraid of myself.
Till, i didn't really look at myself in the mirror for more than 5mins.
:(
Not only that, I think i am ugly.
Really really ugly.
I can never be pretty wait, I am never pretty :(
How can I be pretty when I have an ugly heart?
I will always have this ugly heart with me, no matter how hard i try to change my appearance or style.
Till the day, I told myself my heart isn't ulgy, that's the day i think i am pretty.
And will that day ever come?
NO, it will never come.
Because I have an ugly heart which can never turn to be pretty.
I have myself to blame for having an ugly heart :(
I guess I am born to be ugly :(
I own some pictures.
Here there are:
The day when the sisters went hungry and decided to have a small korean party style. hehe ^^
sister <3
I really love domo.
Have i told you that i bought domo's mechanical pencil and notebook?
<3
work, work, work.
hi greeny rubbery-wirey hairband.
bath, bath, bath.
sushi, wasabi <3
And I love Mac's Breakfast ^^
I love my prepaid. HEHE ^^
A friend of mine made me feel guilty for saying i have an ugly heart when he mentioned this to me: Isn't it ironic that a girl has an ugly heart when she still cares about her loved ones although she, herself, is struggling with her own life?
:(
Whatever it is, I think I have an ugly heart.
My pasts tell it all.
Sadly, even my present too.
:(
